“I really don’t understand why it's considered normal to stare at someone’s eyeballs” - John Elder Robinson
Many children with Autism struggle with eye contact. Making eye contact is an important skill because it lets someone know we’re engaged and interested in the conversation and that we acknowledge their presence. This makes it one of the first concerns of many parents and one of the biggest goals they want to see their child accomplishing through a treatment program like ABA. Much of ABA instruction also involves specific demands, and if a child is not properly attending then it can be difficult to provide the most effective treatment.
What someone believes to be indicators of “paying attention” (which for many is constant eye contact) can actually be challenging behaviors for a child with Autism. Some situations and behaviors can make paying attention difficult. For example, yesterday I sat in an ABA therapy session that was focused on how frequently the child made eye contact during different activities. Because the activity was one of the child’s favorites (Legos), he had difficulty paying attention to the therapist. The therapist had to give him demands like “can I have a Lego piece?” multiple times to get the appropriate response. To get him to eventually move on from the activity, the therapist set a timer that provided the right structure.
Social difficulties also correlate with lesser eye contact. For some children, looking directly into someone’s eyes can make them feel anxious. Even standing in close proximity to someone can be a very uncomfortable which makes it harder to pay attention.
The Autism Guide advises that for families with kids who struggle with Autism one of the first steps is to request eye contact daily in some form. “Each day, say your child’s name followed by “look at me.” Do this every five minutes for one hour and note whether or not the child makes eye contact. When you say the child’s name and the phrase “look at me,” only say it one time in a firm voice, but do not shout, or have a pleading tone in your voice.” Another way is to make sure the activity is child specific. By giving them options like “should we play with the cars or the train?” the child is involved in the structure of the session and more inclined to pay attention.
Many children with Autism struggle with eye contact. Making eye contact is an important skill because it lets someone know we’re engaged and interested in the conversation and that we acknowledge their presence. This makes it one of the first concerns of many parents and one of the biggest goals they want to see their child accomplishing through a treatment program like ABA. Much of ABA instruction also involves specific demands, and if a child is not properly attending then it can be difficult to provide the most effective treatment.
What someone believes to be indicators of “paying attention” (which for many is constant eye contact) can actually be challenging behaviors for a child with Autism. Some situations and behaviors can make paying attention difficult. For example, yesterday I sat in an ABA therapy session that was focused on how frequently the child made eye contact during different activities. Because the activity was one of the child’s favorites (Legos), he had difficulty paying attention to the therapist. The therapist had to give him demands like “can I have a Lego piece?” multiple times to get the appropriate response. To get him to eventually move on from the activity, the therapist set a timer that provided the right structure.
Social difficulties also correlate with lesser eye contact. For some children, looking directly into someone’s eyes can make them feel anxious. Even standing in close proximity to someone can be a very uncomfortable which makes it harder to pay attention.
The Autism Guide advises that for families with kids who struggle with Autism one of the first steps is to request eye contact daily in some form. “Each day, say your child’s name followed by “look at me.” Do this every five minutes for one hour and note whether or not the child makes eye contact. When you say the child’s name and the phrase “look at me,” only say it one time in a firm voice, but do not shout, or have a pleading tone in your voice.” Another way is to make sure the activity is child specific. By giving them options like “should we play with the cars or the train?” the child is involved in the structure of the session and more inclined to pay attention.
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